It has been a few days...

I have not gotten into my blog schedule since I have been home. Things are good and I have come to a lot of conclusions about myself and work.

1. I will never work for a company again.
2. Companies like to play the blame game and never really accomplish anything.
3. I will always work for myself.
4. I can never be behind a desk
5. Companies are just about the bottom line.
6. Bosses always yell at someone.


Okay so these are a few truths. I have worked for this company for three months and I am more stressed than I was doing deals. I have not liked it and it seems that it is going to end anyway. They hired me for a certain position and I cannot fill that anymore because the construction site/asbestos removal/dust site I was working on. Well they need to hire someone else and I am going to leave in September. One thing I have learned is that everything in life happens for a reason. I did not like working there and so I know that an angel did for me what I could simply not do for myself.

So what will the future bring: babies, energy work/healing and nutrition school. The path will be right in front of me and I am excited. I feel clean about this because I know this is what is supposed to happen. This was a bridge and I am thankful for it and ready to go.

As for the baby, he/she feels the same. Things are good with us. Sleep is better. Health if great and we are off to Mexico in two days. This could not have been more of a gift to me.

Enjoy and love to all of you.

PS. Thanks Dory for the laughs, the real talks and all that other good healing.

Home?? Work??

As I am sure all of you know, I am working from home. The building I was working in is a full construction site. Between the dust, asbestos removal and just basic construction, it was even too much for me. Now I am the kid who skateboards with no helmet but I was not comfortable. It is easy not to think there is a little baby in there when you are not fat and house-like and can't catch your breath. But now, a belly, tough time breathing and so tired with the heat..Oh Boy, I am prego. So with that, I am home working here which is strange because I do the same amount of work but I feel guilty. Most people would be happy-not working too many hours and getting paid the same..me I do not feel right. But it is what it is and I have made Scott;s life tough enough with the attitude that I am going to let it go and move on. This brings me to another topic-pregnancy and sensitivity. Okay, I am sensitive to everything. Say one thing to me and it feels like the world is crashing down. Okay. Stop. Breathe and realize that you are pregnant and sensitive to begin with. Does this mean that I am nutty, NO!! It means that I do not want to hear drama. I can't take it. So a truth for woman: hormones stink!

Another pregnancy truth-chew gum to help with the heartburn. Another truth-your tummy and boobs are so hot but the rest of your body ios cool. Wear a sweatshirt/long sleeve and then let your tummy and boobs hang out. It looks funny but it works. Also, when sleeping..switch sides because it seems when I sleep on the left too much-well I pee all night. Also, don't get near your husband/partner because he will start to sweat from your heat. Drink tons of water and eat lots of watermelon but not before bed because I had to pee 12 times last night. Another truth-the back of your arms will start to look like you are 90. Again, your things will rub and your will have a large pimple somewhere on your face/back at all times. People will also tell you that you are cute or maybe this is me because I am short. They will also touch your belly and say..aaahhhh.

So onto my buddies who keep me sane. Thanks Stacy S for all your help, love and support. You have always been there for me.

Okay..gotta run.

Father's Day at the beach-Scott's family

We had a wonderful time. I enjoyed myself so much. The food was great, the sun was wonderful and Scott's family was a lot of fun. I just love talking to his step-mom's family. The bubbi is truly a special woman. here are some pics from that day. It is amazing to be able to show up with family and be myself. I realized it is because I have a network of amazing woman in my life who help me walk through any situation with grace. it is not that they are not painful..but I get to leave the garbage in the can. So as for me..it was great. A good learning experience.

Here are some pictures.

Father's Day at Jones

So my family and I went to Jone's for Father's Day brunch. Here is a pic of us..

Scott and Jeremy are missing in action.

13 1//2 weeks Pic

Sorry I have been lax on the Pics. This was a few days ago...

Jeremy's Graduation Pics

He is so grown up and handsome!

OH SHIT, my thighs are rubbing.

Ok so Monday am I cried fro two hours about my thighs rubbing together. I have never felt this in my life and to work out 4 times a week, eat well..but still get fat. So the trama ended when I just realized that it is what it is. But rubbing of the thighs? I thought I would get a big tummy but stay the same everywhere else and let me say that this is not the case. I am BIG! I eat whole foods, protein and chocolate every four days or every two days when I am feeling bad. This week I have been sicka nd run down. I need a break at work. I am working 6 days a week and last week threw an event and I still have not recovered. So I am running on empty and tomorrow is father's day. Oh Boy. Let me just say it will be interesting. I do not have to get into specifics but some stuff happened and I have not seen a few of my in laws in a while and it will be strange. But I have been through starnger times. I am excited to go and see Scott's family-they are really great people. Aunt's, uncle's, bubbies, parents, bubies and all will be at the shore. BBQ and it will be in the 90's. Oh BOY!

As for my folks, brunch at Jone's this am. We had a blast. It has taken my family a long time to be with each other with ease and we are finally there. We all just ahve a great time together and I know a lot has to do with Scott. My family changed when he came into my life. Thank you honey. I changed. Again, thank you. I love you.

So people are starting to ask about my birth plan. Interesting and crazy. It is starnge because a few months ago I was so grossed out by the thought of giving birth but now..as I get bigger..I feel the felling.."COME OUT!!" I knwo why women just go into delivery and have no shame because at that point you just want the baby out.

Last night we went out to dinner at Avanti's in Pennington, NJ and it was amazing. I have not said that for a long time but it was so good. I has tilapia and pasta. Scott had chicken and pasta. Our friends, Dory and David had pasta and tilapia as well. I was impressed. Dinner was great. We laughed and on the way home we sang together. My new favorite music is oldies and so I know this baby is ALL Scott with the music. Loves Frank Sinatra too!

So I also have to thank my girlfriend Stacey for making me feel that it is ok to put on weight and she assured me that at 5 months it will all move to my belly. Right now the body is just storing up for the next few months..but rubbing thighs?

So that is my new book, Rubbing Thighs: a documentry by Rachel F.

Lots of love today!

HELLO!!

I just wanted to catch up since it has been a few days. Lets me first say thank you to Dory for just being her and being in my life as the BEST accupuncturist in the US. She is truly wonderful.

And thanks to my mom for always being so loving.

Now on the the other stuff. I read a number of blogs about pregnancy and I follow a few where pregnancy has not been easy. A girl who was 10 weeks pregnant just lost her baby and this is the fifth loss. I realize how lucky we were considering we tried for one day. It is amazing when you get out of yourself enough to see Grace.

Bad night last night-ate at Stewarts then ate a big cookie..then got aick 3 times. I vowed today no more sugar. It makes me mean and fiesty, as Scott told me the other night. Just a lot of fruit and natural sugars.

Today for lunch: salad with carrot ginger salad dressing, beets, dandelion and hemp seeds.

Carrot ginger dressing: carrots(boiled) then food proccess them with orange juice, miso, ginger, garlic, sesame oil and walnut oil (or another oil like safflower). Yummy!!

Snack: Kefir and cherries.

Okay enough for today. Just be gratfeul today!

today..

Today Dory and Gabriel came over to play with the doggies and it was so much fun. Let me just say that they brought me strawberries, asparagus, peaches and cherries. Yummy!

So thank you Dory and Gabriel!

I am so tired today and feeling annoyed. I think it is because it is so nice and he I am sitting on the 6th floor of a vacant building with nobody but myself. When I began this job, I thought I would be working with people but that is not the case. Again, I just need to remember that I have five more months max. I may even check out in mid October. All is good and I am still grateful..I just like to work with people and not alone. Work is only a four letter word..lol
Lunch: Tempeh, greens, millet/lentil cake, Dal, and salad

Snack: Finishing lunch and a bluebbery muffin.

I brough the cherries but I will save them for tomorrow.

Until next time!

The early days

DPO (Days Past Ovulation)

I took this from a journal that I had started before the blog.

5dpo-relaxed and boobs big
6dpo-extreme smell
7dpo-zits on forehead and back
11dpo-hungry and craving sweets
12dpo-extreme cramping-left side to where I cannot stand up straight
13dpo-nausea and cramping on left side
14dpo-bitchy and so tired
14-17dpo-numb upper lip and metal taste in the mouth, lots of zite on my back
15po-tired and lower back pain
16dpo-tired
17dpo-tired and pain in left hip/leg-boobs hurt to touch/big
18dpo-boobs hot and swollen-waking up to pee in the middle of the night
21dpo-not feeling great.

4/16/06-told my parents
4/20/06-tons of cravings
4/21/06-whole family knows-secret did not last too long-we were not going to say anything till 3 months-yeah right.
4/22/06-5th or 6th week-boobs hurt, stomach bloated, nausea is getting bad but not throwing up-tons of water, dandelion tea-no short term memory-wake up at 12 am every night and then 3 am and then 6 am.
4/26/06-6 weeks 2 days-Scott's dad told everyone..lol..sleeping better at night-saw OBGYN-all good.glowing
4/27/06-cravings balck beans and walnuts
4/28/06-ate a burrito from el fuego-sleeping is tough because I am so hot.
4/29/06-burritos, garlic and still wearing the same jeans
05/01/06-mexican, pizza-yummy and big boobs.
05/02/06-ssoooooooooo tired.
05/03/06-moody, first day at new job.peanuts yummy!. woke at 12 am again. taking magnesium pills to help things flow.
05/04/06-apples, yogurt, nuts. fingers swollen.
05/07/06-little belly-do not fit into my jeans, yummy soy crisps, need more fiber. scott put on 10 lbs.-scott is running the broad street run today.
05/11/06-no energy
05/14/06-mother'sa day race-last year he proposed..this year wedding and baby

It has been a while..

So it has been a few days since I last posted. I have been busy and I was sick for a few days..nothing big just not feeling great. I am better now and feeling good. I have been doing a lot of walking and going to the gym about 3-4 times a week. I have to start Yoga soon and get this body stretching. But everything is just flowing. Scott has been doing great. Business is good for him and so that makes him feel good. I have been working hard to not take things personal at work and it seems to be working. I am able to be objective-this is a concept that I have always wanted to live by and now I am-at least part of the time.

So for my family-My bother graduated and I am so proud of him and he has become such a great man. He was always an amazing kid but now he is a man. Good Job to my parents!

Today I went and got a pedicure, and eye brow wax and bought some make-up. Ah, the good life. It is so nice to treat myself which is something that I have learned duing this pregnancy.

As for my belly-I guess because I am small, my belly just shows more because you would think I was 5 months pregnant. But I am eating well and going to the gym, so there is nothing I can do..it is what it is..

As for life, just remember that everything we need is right in front of us.

As for my favorite topic: FOOD!!!

Breakfast: Watermelon!!

Lunch today: tofu, blanched greens, millet cake, black bean salad, a spelt bluebbery bar, and peppermint tea with honey.

snack: almonds

YUMMY!!

Very lucky

Just wanted to say that I could not be luckier. Pregnant and happy with where my life is today. I often think about the times in my life where I have not been happy and I know that it was my perspective that was in my way. I have been so fortunate to live on both side of the coin-the one where I thought that I did not have enough and the one where everything I need is in front of me.

Today I am learning to just let go and let it be, for the sake of me and for the sake of the baby. This baby has forced me to look at life differently and appreciate the very things that once scared me. So today, stop and look around at what you do have and not what you WANT!

As for food, I love V-8 juice. Lunch was great as usual and I made a ginger carrot miso dressing that was die for.

Again thnk you to my husband, who has helped me to see the glass 1/2 full always.

Yummy-protein pregnancy shake

Meal Shake
This smoothie is a full of protein, vitamins, and minerals.

1 cup milk (nondairy) or kefir
1/4 cup juice (apple, pineapple, etc.)
1 cup fresh or frozen berries (strawberries, blueberries, etc.)
1 tablespoon flax
1 tablespoon hemp seed
1 teaspoon flaxseed oil
1/4 teaspoon spirulina powder

Place blender and grind to powder. Add remaining ingredients and puree until smooth.

Makes 2 servings

This is my version of Cathe Olson's, but she is the author of “Simply Natural Baby Food” and “The Vegetarian Mother’s Cookbook: Whole foods to nourish pregnant and breastfeeding women – and their families.” For more information or to order a book, visit www.simplynaturalbooks.com.

Updating the food list-

can't even look at peanut butter
can't event look at a Humentachen
Love Vietnemese Vegetable Hot and Sour Soup-Nam Phuong-New Favorite
Love Watermelon
Love Pineapple
Love Strawberries
Need Anything cold and light
Love Wheatgrass shots

Lunch today-From Essenne -salad, kale, tofu with curry, and egg frittata with broccoli.

Yummy! I also have an organic fugi apple sitting here next to me waiting for me to eat it. It is strange how my entire life is now about food. But good food none the less.

On another note, ever since I got pregnant I am so in tune to people and thier bahaviors. Isn't interesting when we are plaqued with people who are so self serving. I have wondered my whole life if they are happy or if they even know that they are this way. They just seem to go through life only thinking of themselves. Interesting huh. I am so lucky to have good people in my life.

As for my sister-I know it will all work out with life-never stop seeing the stars! I love you.

As for the women who I love- Kathy, Joy, Lauren, Dory, Andrea, and Bari-thanks for being there and always being selfless.

Today-PAY IT FORWARD!

Chillin in Mexico-

I decided to put this one up because it is raining today and does not plan to stop so this is my way of bringing a nice tan and the SUN to the moment.